shall make a quick entry.
guess what? i actually met up with the guys today. meaning. i met up with nel. hahas. it wasnt planned tho. went pjc with priss to try appeal. met ben and we headed dwn to nyjc. wanted to appeal bt i finally decided nt to. it's too troublesome. so, i'm staying in cjc. ben asked us to go town to meet the guys. so yea. tt was how it happened.
it wasnt bad or anyth. bt when i saw him, what ben told me started ringing in my head. everyth somewhat comes back to me. smth tt he said made me think. ayes. somehw after tt, i kept thinking abt him. oh yah. one reason why i've decided to go meet up with him. i guess, i wld have little chances of meeting him alrdy. want to see him agn. hah. i met him on the last day of my hols. hw cool is this. lalala. i dont quite like hw i'm feeling inside. bt still, i'm feeling btr and all. just tt i do miss him.
me and priss didnt rrly spent a long time with them. sort of meet up only. we went walk walk, and catch a movie tgr.
am going cj with fifi tmr. will meet up with priss after tt. hahas. decided to meet to gossip.
good luck to everyone.
|
hah. i'm going cj. hmm. might wna try appeal for ny. bt if i dont get it, then it's okay. guess i shld be fine thr.
anyway. i sort of predicted it.
good luck to all.
|
sigh-
i havent been coming online for a rrly long time and i finally get a chance to.
aint feeling too good nw. why? thought i was suppose to be okay, feeling much btr and all. erms. alright. shall say tt i am rrly feeling btr bt...nvm. i find it so hard to describe hw i feel. i rrly want to move on, bt still, i cant picture myself with anyone else, just yet. all tt's on my mind nw is, i just want sch to start. i want to have smth for me to rrly concentrate on. i guess it's also because i dont rrly have anyth to think abt tt's why all these are happening. i'm tired. sick too. and also. these things are always happening. i feel myself running abt in a circle agn and agn. i rrly dont like this. i need to get a life. i need to get out of everyth.
i'm rrly feeling btr too.
well. sincerly, all the best.
anyway. tt sy rogers talk on sat was gd. i felt btr after tt svc. tt svc was great man. hmm. am rrly looking forward to this sat, easter at SIS. it's gna be great ah. actually i find myself always looking forward to svc every sat. yea. i want to talk to my parents.
sheesh. been rrly like out every day man. wanted to get my bag, wallet and organiser. eventually, i ended up getting stationery. i cant see anyth tt i rrly like man. shall look out for them slowly.
the tribute to nice girls was good. so was the tribute to nice guys.
dad bought me a phone ydae. 7260. i still like my old hp tho. he's nice. rrly nice.
getting posting tmr. hopefully i can get nyjc. pray hard.
many things on my mind. i dont rrly knw what to say nw.
having a bad migrain prob since like evening.
| Monday, March 14, 2005
havent done much today. basically slacked the whole day.
am going bouldering tmr and meeting sherin ltr in the evening.
think i have to go hm nw. i dont have clothes for tmr.
ciaos!
i think i was quite mad to have tt kinda thoughts today. and tt entry of mine. was pretty pathetic.
|
yes. as my nick goes. i woke up with my mind full of images of uu. it wasnt a very good slp.
i dream of us being together agn and all bt, u dont seem to very sincere in wanting to be with me. uu dont seem happy. in fact, i'm still nt too sure if we are together or maybe, we're just dating agn. it's all so weird.
feel like asking uu to come over here. my bro's plc. bt yea. hah.
however, if u happen to be reading my blog. feel free to come over any time today. i mean it. if i'm nt at hm. i'll be at the pool or the gym.
everyth's impossible.
yup. u're right. nth else matters.
i dont think u're even reading my blog anymre.
|
many things has happened this week. leaving me tired, slightly ill and frustrated. feel tt i've grown alot in this week.
firstly. on thurs, i realise all my money in my bank, tt's like 820 bucks were gone. all thanks to tt incorrigible thieft tt stole my wallet and hp. he cld actually guess my password. it was horrible. bt, smth to be thankful abt, my whole family had been rrly nice to me, despite me showing attitude and all. everyone gave me money bt, i'm still broke. rrly. i hate this feeling.
secondly, went for rev benny hin's crusade on sat. we were thr like bright and early outside the SIS to queeue. finally gt in like 1 plus and svc started at ard 3.30. it was a good svc too. impressive and memorable. sang abt 200 or mre hallelujah. lols. gt this frm ben. many cried, many were healed. went to bugis for dinner after the whole thing. had gastric. wanted to take a cab hm frm yck bt decided nt to. have to stop tt kind of lifestyle. think i've been spending quite lavishly.
this morning, gt up early agn to go for our own svc at SIS agn. many were thr. i think we sorta gt ben into trouble. it was a great svc too. i love the songs. during the singing and all, i thought abt many things. started crying and crying. started to realise many things. i talked to priss and sherin. sherin suggested talking to me on tues. she wants to knw everyth. she asked me quite a few critical questions tt kinda gt me stumped. i guess, i dont even knw what i rrly want nw.
all uu wanted was me to be saved, me to be happy, just like uu. uu want us to be common, to be the same, bt, i rejected ur offer, i rejected his love, because of my stubborness and my so called beliefs. i regretted today. finally. regretted everyth. also, in sm ways tt i've treated uu. i've been rather selfish. in fact, i guess, like what uu say, i'm the one tt hastened the process of our breakup, the final stage of us being together, when it cld have been a much better time. perhaps, we wldnt even be the way we are nw.
i need to think abt what i want.
bt if tt's rrly what i want, i'll go for it. however, i do not have enough faith and confidence tt things will work out the way i want them too. things have changed. the world doesnt stop revolving because of one stupid mistake tt i've made.
i dream of uu when i had my afternoon nap.
goodnights.
-imissurtouch.
| Wednesday, March 09, 2005
cldnt slp last night.
hw much i wish tt when i woke up this morning. everyday tt happened yesterday was a dream. i hate tt squishy feeling in my heart right nw. if uu guys get what i mean. i feel lonely. i dont have anyth to contact anyone. bt, agn, it's also a good time to just be alone. might nt be getting a phone tt soon. anyway, thr isnt any impt special someone for me to contact.
i've been down on luck.
i'm feeling dwn.
i need a hug. i need ur arms. can uu help me?
|
i think i was crazy saying all those to uu.
i'm losing it.
i need to get a grip.
i need to get back to hw i was.
it's just today. i'm just too weak today.
my heart aches. my eyes hurt too. i'm tired.
-i'm so srry agn for everyth tt i've caused uu. for everyth abt me.
we're just nt meant to be. things between us are always difficult.
goodnight.
| Tuesday, March 08, 2005
my hp and wallet gt stolen today. i've used my phone for barely a mth.
actually i was the one tt called uu this afternoon. it wasnt ben. bt since u said u were busy, i told ben tt it's okay. i just felt like talking to uu, telling uu what happened. i knw i'm stupid because whatever happened to me, doesnt seem to concern uu anymre. what can uu tell me? at tt time, when i was sitting on the floor, talking to priss and ben, i felt like being in ur arms. i knw i wld have felt alot btr than i was actually feeling. in fact, i dont think i was feeling tt bad, i just miss being in ur arms, being wrapped ard by uu, just miss uu. when u said u were busy, it was bad. bt then agn, i knw if i rrly get a chance to talk to uu, i wld regret after tt. it's just as ben as said, i'm just crashing dwn everyth tt i've built for myself. so yea. i feel like going out to meet uu nw, n to kiss uu. hahas. it seems crazy to say this bt even a fling wld be gd. hah. i wonder what i'm talking abt. i feel crazy.
aint quite feeling anyth after i lost my phone. was still able to laugh with them. ayes.
and also. i'm angry with my sis. sis in law drove me hm to collect my things because i've decided to stay here tonight agn. i overheard the conversation b/w my sis and her bf, and my sis with my dad when i was packing upstairs. she was complaining abt my attitude towards the lost of my hp. bt think. what can i do after i lost them. and then, she started saying tt she paid the phone for me, blah blah. like hello. i knw i was suppose to pay uu the phone, and i'll pay uu no matter what. i told uu to get it frm me when i come back and so on, bt u dont even come back. hw the hell am i suppose to return uu huh. so stop bring things up. she even said tt the first time my hp gt stolen, she paid for me too. bt, i was the one tt paid for it myself. she tends to bring everyth up when she's unhappy. i'm angry. therefore, even if she wld want to pay it for me, i'll still want to pay it for myself, to stop anyth frm happening. in case she tells me, rmb hw i used to treat u, hw i paid for ur stuff, and this is ur attitude towards me, blah blah. whatever luhh alright!
pardon me for being so pissed off right nw. guess i'm just starting to feel everyth.
im seriously broke. i do nt even have a dollar with me.
freak.
why.
|
Going crazy. Natalie
Ever since the day you went away
and left me lonely and cold
my life just hasn't been the same
oh baby no
when i looked into your eyes
the moment that i let you go i just broke down
baby if i ever get the chance to be with you again
I would sacrafice
Cuz the feelin that I feel within no other man would ever make me feel so right
its nice to smile when i get your phone call at night
But I rather have you here with me
right next to me
and I miss the way you hold me tight
I've got to let you know I feel so weak without your touch
I never thought that i could ever love a man so much
I've gotta let you know I think that we are destiny
For you I'd cross the world for you
I'd do anything
That's right baby
Im goin crazy
I need to be your lady
I been thinkin lately
that you and me yes we can make it
just ride with me roll with me
Im in love with you (baby)
Thats right baby
Im goin crazy
I need to be your lady
I been thinkin lately
that you and me yes we can make it
just ride with me roll with me
Im in love with you (baby)
break it down then I'll tell you what i feel
from the moment that i met you its been so damn real
my heart seems to skip another beat every time we speak
Can't belive I feel so weak
tell me that you really need me
and you want me
and you miss me
and you love me
I'm your lady
I'll be around waitin for you
put it down be the woman for you
im fallin so deep for you
crazy over you im callin
callin out to you
what am i gonna do?
its true no frontin
it's u ain't no other
I can no longer go on without you
I just break down (down)
I've got to let you know I feel so weak without your touch
I never thought that i could ever love a man so much
I've gotta let you know I think that we are destiny
For you I'd cross the world for you
I'd do anything
Thats right baby
Im goin crazy
I need to be your lady
I been thinkin lately
that you and me, yes we can make it
just ride with me roll with me
Im in love with you (baby)
Thats right baby
Im goin crazy
I need to be your lady
I been thinkin lately
that you and me, yes we can make it
just ride with me roll with me
Im in love with you (baby)
ooo, crazy,(ooo),
lady (ooo),
lately (ooo)
Baby
i aint feeling tt good tonight. teared in the train. i guess i'm just in tt mood. watched hitch and tt left me thinking abt smths. i wonder what rrly went wrong with me today. cant help it. things tt happened are still vaguely in my mind. guess i'm just feeling the nostalgia.
i rmb the period of time where i used to cry alot. on the bus. on the train. at ur hs. at my hs. in ur arms. whatever. i'd always bit my lips to try to control the welling tears in my eyes frm falling onto my cheeks. i want to hide everyth tt i'm feeling inside so tt u'll see a happy me. because u'd always want me to be happy. bt, uu knw me. and whenever tt happens. u'll turned my face at uu. u'll look into my eyes and ask me why. u'd tell me. "darling. i'm srry. i wldnt want to leave u if i had a choice. i'm rrly srry." it seriously isnt only what uu said tt matters, bt it's also the way uu look deeply into my eyes, telling me hw in love uu were with me. hw much uu hate to have to leave me.
the look in ur eyes. the way uu talked. tt kind of smile tt told me, hey. no matter what happenes, i'll always love uu. all these. are things tt truly matters.
the times tt were great. however, i wont give it a chance to happen agn.
u'd nvr knw. u'd nvr understand. no one every wld.
pardon me. just tonight. i wna be like this.
i wna be alone.
i'm crying behind behind the computer screen. and telling others tt i'm fine.
| Monday, March 07, 2005
sometimes, things just happen tt way huh. esp when u least expected it. i do think. i admit i do, bt nt as much. at tt time. it hurts like anyth. like mre than anyone cld imagine, bt, life goes on. i'm strong. or maybe getting stronger, getting mre independent. all tt were in my mind werent said. they werent understood by anyone.
i'm happier this way. like what everyone said.
guess i'm just cranky.
nahhs. maybe nt tt.
hah.
| Sunday, March 06, 2005
went blading today with my sis in law. had a fall bt it wasnt a bad one. still bleeding tho. hahhas. urhs. sat at coffee bean and read the mag together. had duck rice for lunch. man. i seriously love the duck rice at ecp. it's great. okay. saw like 2-3 nt bad looking guys. ahahhas. went for for dinner and i'm here. anyway. did i mention tt i'm peeling rrly badly? my face, my body. i'm so ugly nw!
i still love the lyrics [i'll stand by you] it's such a meaningful song.
shld be crashing ijc with my friends tmr. hahahs. gna look funny with dyed hair in uniform, and my peeling face. lols.
ciaos!
| Saturday, March 05, 2005
the conference b/w ben, priss and me made me think agn. aint feeling too good nw. u havent gave me enough time. i havent had enough space. i wasnt given enough chance. however, whatever it is, it no longer matters.
been slping here for the past few nights. i rrly like it here.
anyway. i've submitted my jae thing. finally decided to put nyjc as my first choice. because it's closer to hm, it offers me aep, it offers me 4 sub, so on. i've weighed the advantages/disadvantages of going to either acjc or nyjc. concluded tt i want art as a subject mre than the culture of acjc. i've always loved arts so yea. why nt? furthermore, i wld rather go to a simple sch and do well, rather than going to a gd sch and fail my As. so yea. oh yah. and jill thinks tt i'm mre of a artsy person rather than science. she even said tt she can imagine me designing things, bt nt mixing chemicals. lols. bt i'm still gna take the science course tho. urhs. although, it's nt definite tt i'll definitely get in to the aep because i wld have to take an entrance test, at least i knw i've tried. at least i wld have smth to look forward to when i go to sch. =)
hmm. shant say anymre. the sooner i make my decision, the lesser i have to think abt. i seriously do nt want to think abt these things anymre. i wna just move on. i wna go to sch.
going service agn tmr. bt this time with priss. will be meeting sherin before service tho.
goodnights.
i can no longer slp before 2.
| Friday, March 04, 2005
darn. i'm so confuse abt my jae. thinking if i shld put acjc/sajc/nyjc as first choice. i'm able to take 4 subs only in sajc/nyjc. i wld like to experience the kinda lifestyle, and the kinda culture in acjc/sajc. bt also, i'm afraid of nt being able to fit in in acjc because of the ppl thr. furthermore, it's a prestigious sch, money in a way, is a problem. i wldnt want to be stressed up over all these things. ayes. i want to go nyjc because they have art and design, as an elec which is attractive to me, and it's nearer. i'm soo soo confuse. i dont even knw what i want anymre. i've talked to so many ppl, heard so much things.
thank god the application is extended till mon. shall give myself one mre day to think.
i had a crazy idea of going out to meet uu for awhile. since i'm staying at my sis-in-law's hs tonight. hahas. i'm nuts.
ohh yah. and i lost their hs keys today.
too stupid. too blur. too confuse.
| Thursday, March 03, 2005
i'm at my bro's hs nw. was just suppose to come here and do tt jae thing then go hm bt because it's too late, i'm gna stay here tonight. i'm nt done with tt jae thing too. it's super laggy with so many ppl applying their courses. so yea. shall continue tmr. i'm too tired, and i'm having a bad headache for the whole day. think it's because of the sun yesterday and also due to insufficient slp. anyway. the burns are killing me. it's so painful.
gt like 11 after bonus deductions. am quite troubled abt what schs to apply for, hw shld be my choices be made. i dont wna regret agn like PSLE. anyway. i'm quite sure tt my first 3choices are impossible bt i'm just gna try. at least i won't regret.
went out agn today. been going out every single day man. am quite tired of doing tt bt i dont wna stay at hm too. think i'm just gna stay at my bro's plc tmr.
whenever i see rai and her bf, i'm reminded of uu and me. like hw sweet uu were when u were with me. bt i'm refering to the old nelson.
pardon me.
goodnights.
i'm so lack of slp.
| Wednesday, March 02, 2005
am talking to ben nw. he called me. hah. basically, i'm just trying to say tt i'm multi tasking tt's all, so pardon me.
had a friggin good time in sentosa today. am red! tanned and it's shoik. played volley and captains ball. swam a few times to the 2 diff platforms. even danced on one of them, and tt was seriously hilarious.
had pasta for dinner at nydc in orchard after tt.
tt's just a rrly short summary because i cant rrly think nw.
rmb me saying tt sentosa isnt the same anymre the first time i went w/o him? it feels so much better today. i'm beginning to love it agn. tho when i was in the bus i teared abit when i started thinking and thinking. yea, i still think bt, tt's all.
ciaos!
- tina/teena =)
- sexy seventeen
- 280688
- angmokionorth pri. anderson pri. naval base secondary. catholic jc.
- singapore!
- tinatoh88@hotmail.com
- i am. a procrastinator. full of crap. quite materialistic. vainpot. noisy. pampered. indecisive.
- Loves. orange. black. turqoise. green(my current fav).
- the sun and the sea! suntanning. rollerblading. netball. badminton. swimming. sports.
- shopping. bikinis! clothes! sleeping. eating. talking. music.
- apples. watermelon. oranges. mango. fruits!
- the sweetest buds ard me! nbss clique and current clique.
- Hates. creepy crawlies. insects. breakingup. disappointment. backstabbers. liars. hypocrites.
gillian
tiffany
jaymie
alicia
alicia(nbss)
jillian
kahyee
benedict
kairenk
kenneth
raihanah
weilin
cornelius
michelle
elena
jeslyn
christopher
aloysius
shunxie
the shots.
ndp/club
racial harmony
hollandv
birthdaypics
random sch pics
credits:
[danhan&]
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